Gone, revisited.

With the passing of my Aunt Nita yesterday...I decided to revisit and share this song. I wrote it about the words which surround us during times of loss. We all stand inside heartache in our own way. "Some days you let go / some days, you just don't know." - JDH

Gone (Days Like These)

v1

Whispered voices

In mid embraces

Say

There will be days like these

There will be days like these

Misplaced voices

In quiet places

Say

Just get through, days like these

You’ll get through, days like these

But no one said anything

About it lasting this long

I guess it is just the balance of life

Now that she’s gone

Chorus

Now that she’s gone

In these halls

In these rooms

An ache builds

A make-shift residence

Now that she’s gone

In these hours

In these days

A hurt buries deep,

Sparing no expense

Now that she’s gone

v2

Trusted voices

In family faces

Say

Get beyond, the days like these

Leave behind, days like these

Loosened voices

In good graces

Say

You’ll forget, days like these

Once familiar, days like these

And no one will measure

Healing finally comes along

And Time finds time to stitches up your heart

Now that she’s gone

-Chorus-

Bridge

Some days, You let go

Some days, You just don’t know

You find

You can’t measure a life by a life

As a son, Daughter,

Husband, wife

With lost goodbyes

And no reprieves

You find you stay

Though in your heart

Each day she leaves

-Chorus-

American Songwriter Lyric Contest

Done.

Finished.

Submitted.

Fingers crossed.

The 5 Songs:

To See You Happy, Into You, Something More, Name the Fear and Find Me.

I'm going to share all 5 with you here...together, in one spot. I'll throw in some context of when and why each was written...I'd love to know what you think...so, be in touch.

In researching what songs I wanted to submit, I went back...way back...through years and years of songs. Ultimately, I went with songs that were written in the last couple of years. I felt closer to them and they still resonate inside me.

-JDH

To See You Happy I wrote in about 10minutes - and I love when that happens. When a song comes together like that, so quickly, it is almost always an indication that I didn't censor myself. I wrote this song after the end of a relationship and seeing my Ex moving on. At first I didn't know how to feel...then I realized I was happy just to see them happy.

To See You Happy

v1
So this is how it feels
When enough time has passed
Making things real
Get a little distance
Allow the hurts to heal
From here
I can look at you and finally understand
I was many things
Just not enough to be your man

Chorus
It’s good
To see you happy
And now
To see you happy
Means so much to me
It’s right
To see you happy
So good
To see you happy
As you deserve to be

v2
I will let the future thaw
And just rest outside the past
Though it still feels raw
Trips my tongue
And sticks to my jaw
It isn't easy to call you a friend
Given our history
But our lives will let us write the end

Bridge
I can hold the memory
It will be him holding you, instead of me
It’s gentle ache
To acclimate

Myself to
A quiet break
I appreciate

When I see you

Into You is a song about just letting go and falling in love. I write lyrics, so I have to say that in my mind I hear this as a fun...upbeat song...a song that's got a free-spirit, driving down Hwy 1 in California vibe to it.

Into You

v1

Seems like

I’m stepping outside

Stepping away from everything I know

So bare with me

While I let go

Seems a little

A little unlike me

But when you know, you know

So here I am

And I know

Do us both a favor

Don’t wait for an engraved invitation

Baby, this is your permission

Chorus

Tie me up

Tie me down

Bind me, graft me into you

Into you

Let me in

Shut me out

Hold me, keep me with you

Into you

A four-leaf clover, Hailey’s comet, solar eclipse

It’s that rare for me to fall like this

But here I am

Falling, falling

Into you

v2

Seems like

This is just meant to be

Just this way, uncomplicated

Like my favorite jeans

Fit right and faded

Seems a little

This side of perfect

How our hearts easily navigate

So I follow

Take the bait

Do us both a favor

Let my touch be my indication

Baby, this is your permission

Chorus

Bridge

I’m not saying

Clip my wings

I’m just saying

Know

I’ll always fly right back to you

I’m not saying

Brand my skin

I’m just saying

Know

You’ve already left your mark

Something More is another fun, love song...or, at least, that's what I hear in my head. When I was reading and re-reading songs that I've written over the last few years - I could always find songs about heartache and heartbreak. So, I made conscious effort to find some songs that focused on being in love. I wanted to put that energy out there...and see what comes back.

Something More

v1

I like your toothbrush in my bathroom

Your clothes left on my floor

These everyday

Throw away’s

Make me think there’s something more

Yep, I'm pretty sure, there’s something more

v2

I like how you just go to things in my kitchen

When you slip and say “our” bed

The little things

You just bring

Make me thing there’s something more

Yep, I'm pretty sure, there’s something more

Chorus

Something more

About you

Something more

About me

Something more

You feel

Something more

You see

I've got no clue what will follow today

But that something more makes the unknown feel ok

I'll gladly settle for

Something more

v3

I like how your head always finds my pillow

Your shoes kicked by my door

You're in the way

Most everyday

Makes me think there’s something more

Yep, I'm kinda sure there’s something more

Chorus

Bridge

Stay

And let’s drive each other crazy

Stay

And let’s make each other sane

I'll make room in my closet

I’ll make room in my bed

Why go back to your place

Stay

Right here, let's make this Our place instead

Chorus

Name the Fear I wrote as support to my friends...friends of survival. I have many friends who are survivors...of abuse - in various forms - physical, spiritual, emotional, sexual and psychological. This song I wrote as I moved through therapy and addressed abuse I had sustained. Abuse that left me in need of discovering new ways to cope and process.

The previous songs I felt confident submitting in the lyric competition...they seem radio-ready with the right tune and beat. Name the Fear and Find Me are the two I was the most unsure of. They're both personal and they aren't really love songs. But they're real singer/songwriter songs and, at the core, that's who I am.

I'm partial to the lyrics of the second verse especially the line about being "cornered in a round room." In therapy that was how I felt, at times. When I was writing this song and I wrote that line, I remember exhaling. It was exactly what I needed it to be.

I wanted to include these songs in the competition because they hold more truth, at this time in my life, than the love songs. Understanding the truth and weight of these last 2 songs meant I had no choice but to include them.

Name the Fear

v1
Look me in the eyes
Sit your soul down
Inside my voice
Nothing you say can surprise
Things will shine through
It’ll be clear
When you find the words
To name the fear

Chorus
Baby, name the fear
Nothing can reach you here
What you’re facing
Has to get by me

To get to you
And I’m not letting anything through
I swear
All you need to do, is name the fear

v2
That vow of silence, bend
I’m not that far ahead
Of where you are
How it starts, how it ends
When what was far
Comes dangerously near
Cornered in a round room
Forced to name the fear

I am always amazed at how well we know each other...really know each other.

I remember a friend saying they thought I had it all together. I laughed. I said, I don't even know what that means. I don't want to have it all together. I like the questions of life and faith.

We all have insecurities. Hurts. Scars. Some of us are better at hiding them than others. I write Find Me because the more I talked to my friend, the more convinced they seemed to be that they had me all figured out.

They couldn't have been more wrong.

Find Me

I’ve been right
I’ve been wrong
Come up short
And it’s taken long
To find me

I’ve been a saint
I’ve been a sinner
Lost everything
To feel like a winner
Still I find me

I’ve been there
I’ve been back
Surrendered
Only to attack
So I find me

Chorus
You say
Time always tells
You say
You know me well
Truth is
You know only

What I let you see
Truth is
I’m still my own discovery

And I

I don’t even know all of me

So you

You only get to know

What I let you see

You’re so far ahead, you’re behind
You’re the first person, standing in the wrong line
Only to start again
So count back from ten
Close your eyes, then you'll see
Look the other way and then

You'll find me

so. outdated.

It has been SO long since I've blogged...

But I'm heading back. With new songs, quips & stories.

Stay tuned!

In the meantime in between time...check out older posts and get in touch if you read over some lyrics you like. I'm entering a lyric writing contest and I need help deciding what to submit.

Thanks.
JDH

Into You

A brand new song...I can't even be sure where it came from. It isn't drawn from some wonderful, romantic life experience...at least not yet. Maybe I'm speaking something into being.

This new song, Into You, came in about 10 minutes. Reading back over it, it feels like it wrote itself.

So, I'm sharing it here...

Enjoy.
-JDH

Into You

7/11/10

v1

Seems like

I’m stepping outside

Away from everything I know

So bare with me

While I let go

Seems a little

A little unlike me

But when you know, you know

So here I am

And I know

Do us both a favor

Don’t wait for an engraved invitation

Baby, this is your permission

Chorus

Tie me up

Tie me down

Bind me, graft me into you

Into you

Let me in

Shut me out

Hold me, keep me with you

Into you

A four-leaf clover, Hailey’s comet, solar eclipse

It’s that rare for me to fall like this

But here I am

Falling, falling

Into you

v2

Seems like

This is just meant to be

Just this way, uncomplicated

Like my favorite jeans

Fit right and faded

Seems a little

This side of perfect

Which our hearts easily navigate

So I follow

Take the bait

Do us both a favor

Let my touch be my indication

Baby, this is your permission

Chorus

Bridge

I’m not saying

Clip my wings

I’m just saying

Know

I’ll always fly right back to you

I’m not saying

Brand my skin

I’m just saying

Know

You’ve already left your mark

He Goes

Between Facebook and Twitter...my BLOG becomes neglected. I always mean to do better...but do I? Rarely.

Yesterday I got home from a brief vacation in Richmond, VA - visiting family. I really should write about that...and I will.

For now...I'll share my latest song. He Goes. This is a song I started a couple months ago. When I first started writing it...the words poured out of me. Then, as quickly as it flowed, it ebbed. While I was flying to Richmond earlier in the week, I revisited the song. I hadn't even looked at it in months. As I flew, I reconnected with what I was going through when I first started writing. I stepped back into all the mixed emotions and re-directions. With that step, the flow returned.

He Goes is a simple wrong time, wrong place love song. It's about falling for someone who isn't available. It intrigues me what we sometimes put our hearts through...how we fool ourselves. The song's Bridge enfolds my favorite lines of the song.

He Goes
1/9/10, 4/23/10

Chorus
And he goes
He goes
Contrary to
What I feel
My heart
Already knows
These are borrowed hours
Stolen minutes
‘Til he goes

v1
Middle of the day
Hidden away
From the world outside
I let go and let it ride
You
Making me laugh
Making me smile
Making love to me
Making me believe
In you

A tattoo sleeve
On arms so strong
I think you’ll never leave
I’m playing tricks on my own heart
It’s myself I deceive

Chorus


v2
When you stay
Stolen away
From the world we know
We can escape and go
You
Making me dream
Making me release
Making me explore
Making me believe
In you

Carmel colored lips
Kidnap me and
I forget everything I’ll miss
I’m lost in the game before we start
It’s myself I punish

Chorus


Bridge
You ask me to understand
Trade time for being stronger
It isn’t that you love him more
Just loved him longer

Post-Virginia...two NEW songs...Teeth and Crave

Here and 35.

As I've written already, Virginia was a departure for me. The departure didn't sit the same way with everyone. I got lots of feedback...emails...text messages and a couple of phone calls. One that resonated with me...was from someone who "missed the love songs."

The more I thought about that...the more I understood it. Whether falling in love or falling out love or landing somewhere between...that's mostly what I had written about.

So...I'm sharing a little of both...a new song called Crave, which is a sexy, love song and Teeth, a feisty, spirited auto-bio-song.

Crave is about wanting more of more. That feeling you get when you first fall for someone...completely. Teeth was written in direct response to the feedback from Virginia...there's more to all of us than what people see.

Crave

10/7/09, 1/9/10, 1/24/10, 1/27/10

v1

Step inside, step closer

Come alive, come closer

It’s just us

You and me

Nothing between us

Any separation is a barren desert

Of our own desperation

This anticipation is a cyan blue sea

Of our own creation

Where the sky meets the heavens

At the same time it meets the waves

I will express

If you will confess…

Do you?

Chorus

Crave

Another moment

Crave

Another touch

Crave

Do you?

Crave

Another escape

Crave

Another rush

Crave

v2

Step inside, step within

Come alive, come within

It’s just me

Wanting you

Hanging in the balance

All reservations abandoned

For honest infatuation

Any hesitation now will just side swipe

Our hearts acceleration

Where this can go is up to no one

But the two of us inside this moment

I will profess

You acquiesce

How you…

Chorus

Bridge

You’re intoxicating

Like the ink under your skin

That’s how you’re tattooed

In my life

I want to fill each day

With more of you

Teeth

1/19/10, 1/20/10

v1

You know me

You know me

But did you know

I can hide in plain sight

In lines and lyrics

Transparent and real

But you don’t know I measure

What I reveal

Chorus

In a moment of weakness

In a moment of strength

I showed you my soul

Now I’ll show you my teeth
A split second of forgiveness

Split second of release

I relinquished control

Now I’ll show you my teeth

The artist as lover

Can be a fighter beneath

Love me for my soul

Love me too for my teeth

v2
You know me

You know me

And now you know

I can show my colors

In truth and tantrum

Honesty and secret

But you don’t know I measure

What I regret

Chorus

Bridge

Have I said too much

Have you seen my hand

There is only so much truth

You can comprehend

You wanted to see

More than my heart

You want to know

If I had fight

Well, behind this kiss

Is my bite

Chorus