Post-Virginia...two NEW songs...Teeth and Crave

Here and 35.

As I've written already, Virginia was a departure for me. The departure didn't sit the same way with everyone. I got lots of feedback...emails...text messages and a couple of phone calls. One that resonated with me...was from someone who "missed the love songs."

The more I thought about that...the more I understood it. Whether falling in love or falling out love or landing somewhere between...that's mostly what I had written about.

So...I'm sharing a little of both...a new song called Crave, which is a sexy, love song and Teeth, a feisty, spirited auto-bio-song.

Crave is about wanting more of more. That feeling you get when you first fall for someone...completely. Teeth was written in direct response to the feedback from Virginia...there's more to all of us than what people see.

Crave

10/7/09, 1/9/10, 1/24/10, 1/27/10

v1

Step inside, step closer

Come alive, come closer

It’s just us

You and me

Nothing between us

Any separation is a barren desert

Of our own desperation

This anticipation is a cyan blue sea

Of our own creation

Where the sky meets the heavens

At the same time it meets the waves

I will express

If you will confess…

Do you?

Chorus

Crave

Another moment

Crave

Another touch

Crave

Do you?

Crave

Another escape

Crave

Another rush

Crave

v2

Step inside, step within

Come alive, come within

It’s just me

Wanting you

Hanging in the balance

All reservations abandoned

For honest infatuation

Any hesitation now will just side swipe

Our hearts acceleration

Where this can go is up to no one

But the two of us inside this moment

I will profess

You acquiesce

How you…

Chorus

Bridge

You’re intoxicating

Like the ink under your skin

That’s how you’re tattooed

In my life

I want to fill each day

With more of you

Teeth

1/19/10, 1/20/10

v1

You know me

You know me

But did you know

I can hide in plain sight

In lines and lyrics

Transparent and real

But you don’t know I measure

What I reveal

Chorus

In a moment of weakness

In a moment of strength

I showed you my soul

Now I’ll show you my teeth
A split second of forgiveness

Split second of release

I relinquished control

Now I’ll show you my teeth

The artist as lover

Can be a fighter beneath

Love me for my soul

Love me too for my teeth

v2
You know me

You know me

And now you know

I can show my colors

In truth and tantrum

Honesty and secret

But you don’t know I measure

What I regret

Chorus

Bridge

Have I said too much

Have you seen my hand

There is only so much truth

You can comprehend

You wanted to see

More than my heart

You want to know

If I had fight

Well, behind this kiss

Is my bite

Chorus

Virginia

There is a genesis to this song...it all started with curiosity and melted into fascination. As I read biographies on Virginia Woolf...read parts of her letters and diaries...I discovered a kinship. The connection I felt to her was only strengthened when I discovered we share the same birthday.

Today, January 25th.

I understood her. I understood her life, her demons, her struggles, triumphs, power and, ultimately, her death.

There were several specific things that intrigued me and I gravitated to...things I wanted to incorporate into the song. A quote that Virginia Woolf was pretty but never beautiful...that she was an excellent swimmer...yet she choose to fill her pockets with stones and will herself into a river to drown...she wrote three suicide notes (which is why I chose to repeat the word down three times in the verses) and lastly, I wanted to pay tribute to Emily Sailers of the Indigo Girls whose song, Virginia Woolf, was my first introduction to her life.

I've shared this song with a handful of people - before sharing it here. This song is a different departure for me...it has an unfamiliar shade of transparency to it. The reactions have been all over the spectrum...friends have praised its imagery and questioned my artistry...asking for more fun love songs (those conversations actually sparked their own songs...more on that post-Virginia)...

Those "other" songs are still inside too. They will return...better and emboldened by my other life experiences.

Until then...Virginia.

Virginia

1/9/10, 1/12/10, 1/15/10

v1

Virginia,

Was it the weight of

The water,

The stones

Or world

Pulling you

Down, down, down

Virginia,

Was the escape hidden

In diaries,

The letters

Or books

Writing it

Down, down, down

Chorus

Virginia,

Can you hear me?

Virginia,

Can you see me?

I wade in the water

With stones in my hands

Virginia

Can you free me?

Virginia

Can you teach me?

I’m lost out of the water

I know you understand

I know the voices you hear

I know the faces you see

You and me

We share more

Than a day in January

v2

Virginia

How is madness worn

In dark,

In shade

Or night

Letting you

Down, down, down

Virginia

How are answers made

Carved

In lies

Or truth

Holding you

Down, down, down

Chorus

Bridge

Oh, Virginia

What makes up the sum of you

They said you were:

Always pretty

Never beautiful

Whose eyes did they look through?

Virginia

Strong enough to swim

Virginia

Strong enough to give in

Emily told me,

The river eclipsed your life

But couldn’t touch your legacy

Your will and the water

Pulled you from the surface

Setting you free

Chorus

Pre-Virginia (Part 2)

I've re-read Virginia shared it with a couple of selected friends...even talked about it in therapy...

The song is inspired by and based off the life (and death) of Virginia Woolf.

When I started reading and researching her life, I discovered that we share the same birthday...January 25th. That small discovery made me feel like I had an even stronger kinship with her...

pre-Virginia

I finished Virginia this evening...

A tough, tough song for me.

This song is unlike anything I've ever written...I've re-read it several times, each time I'm afraid its too transparent.

I feel like I've been honest and candid with things I've shared before but this is the first time I've really taken pause and considered how much of myself I'm revealing...

I think I will take another day or two to roll it around in my head and heart before putting it up.

New Song: Bye

It started with Gone (Days Like These) and has continued...

I thought I would revisit some songs that were waiting in the wings to be finished...when inspiration found its way back to me. I've looked over some of the songs and some of them did, indeed, find their endings.

I've been pleasantly surprised by the new songs...songs that have been shaped differently and filled out in new ways.

Some of have been fun and (what I hear in my head as) "upbeat"...like Bye...it feels like a country song to me. Other songs have been darker, for me. I've done some digging...Virginia is one of those. I'm not ready to put it up yet, so for now, here's Bye...

Bye

4/7/08, 8/17/09, 8/23/09, 1/9/10

v1

Here I am

And here you go

We both saw this coming

Had seats on the front row

Something had to give

And baby, I gave

Something has to end

When there’s nothing left to save

How you get from Point A to B

Doesn’t really matter to me

A garage sale or eBay

Craigslist, give it away

Some good things come to an end

It was never that good, a no win

Chorus

This is: bye

Just that, just bye

No more excuses

I’m out of uses

For the stories and lies

This is: bye

v2

Here it is

Just so you know

There was no making it right

To work you’d have to show

Look over your shoulder

Turn back time

But still in the end

It has to be worth the climb

How you get from here to there

Can’t really say I care

Take the lesson and learn

Or just crash and burn

What’s meant to be will find away

Not this time, not here and not today

Bridge

Fool me once

Shame on you

Fool me twice

That’ll do

We all know how the saying goes

So get your shit, pack your clothes

We could do the dance

Hand out one more second chance

But I’ve learned this lesson

All dogs don’t go to Heaven

Gone (Days Like These)

I started this song in August...but really only had a line or two. I set the song aside and knew when the time was right, it would come back around.

This morning...around 1:00am...it came back around.

My Dad's brother, my Uncle Charles, passed away almost a year ago...April of 2009. Thinking back to his funeral...and how my Grandmother, Aunt and Cousins are now responsible for the task of "moving on"...this song came to me.

With the passing of a loved one...with the loss of a job...or, really, the end of any chapter of something important in your life - there are always people who tell you, on the hardest of days, that there are always "days like these." No one tells you...and, in truth no one knows...how long those days will last.

So this song is for my family...but also for all who've experienced loss...

Gone (Days Like These)

8/23/09, 1/7/10, 1/8/10

For those who grieve...

v1

Whispered voices

In mid embraces

Say

There will be days like these

There will be days like these

Misplaced voices

In quiet places

Say

Just get through, days like these

You’ll get through, days like these

But no one said anything

About it lasting this long

I guess it is just the balance of life

Now that he’s gone

Chorus

Now that he’s gone

In these halls

In these rooms

An ache builds

A make-shift residence

Now that he’s gone

In these hours

In these days

A hurt buries deep,

Spares no expense

Now that he’s gone

v2

Trusted voices

In family faces

Say

Get beyond, the days like these

Leave behind, days like these

Loosened voices

In good graces

Say

You’ll forget, days like these

Once familiar, days like these

And no one will measure

When the healing finally comes along

And Time finds time to stitches up your heart

Now that he’s gone

-Chorus-

Bridge

Some days

You let go

Some days

You just don’t know

You find

You can’t measure a life by a life

As a son,

Daughter, husband, wife

With lost goodbyes

And no reprieves

You find you can stay

Though in your heart

Each day he leaves

JDH, Back on the Blog

With Facebook and Twitter...some times the Blog falls to the wayside.

Never for long.

It's a new year. 2010.

For the first time in memory, I was very ready to say goodbye to a year. 2009 was a tough, tough year. I'm glad to have it behind me.

I was going to jot some memories of '09...but I'm just going to let them go...strive to shake it off...

And...start with a clean slate.