Reflections on My 30th Year / LOUDER THAN WORDS

What a year…my 30^th year seems like it has been one long adventure.

Since turning 30 I’ve…celebrated despite an Atlanta ice storm…gotten a small tattoo…saw my parents off to Africa…completed my concert/cabaret trilogy…packed up my entire life into a rental truck…left a fabulous apartment…left a wonderful job and dear co-workers…drove for two days with my friend Greg riding shotgun…moved hundreds of boxes into a four flight walk-up in Spanish Harlem with the help of Greg and my NYC friend, Damon…got a job…quit job…repeat that 3 times…got through mononucleosis…survived the heat of a sidewalks in a New York summer…sold my car…rode the train to Richmond, VA to celebrate Thanksgiving in my brother’s new home…Discovered a renewed sense of humanity during the transit strike that crippled New York City for almost a week…Watched the ball in Times Square fall on New Year’s Eve (from the warm comfort of my living room)…and SO much more. It has been a full year.

I remain so grateful. Grateful for the journey and the dreams. The love and the homesickness. Grateful for ALL of it.

A few weeks ago I came across a song by Jonathan Larson. Jonathan is best known for the Broadway show RENT which he wrote but never got to see Open on Broadway (he died of a brain aneurism on my birthday 10 years ago). He wrote another show, tick..tick BOOM!, that was finished and produced after his death. I wasn’t familiar with the show until recently.

One song in particular, Louder Than Words, has completely engulfed my days. I listen to it daily.

I listen to it as an affirmation.

I listen to it as a prayer.

This song has awakened the questions and answers that have driven and I hope will continue to drive my life and dreams. I decided for my birthday to share the lyrics of this song with you. I hope, if you’re able, that you will go online somewhere and download this song and bask in its beauty and truth.

The spirit of this song is letting your LIFE be your ANSWER to every question

LOUDER THAN WORDS

by Jonathan Larson

Why do we play with fire?
Why do we run our finger through the flame?
Why do we leave our hand on the stove-
Although we know we're in for some pain?

Oh, why do we refuse to hang a light
When the streets are dangerous?
Why does it take an accident
Before the truth gets through to us?

Cages or wings?
Which do you prefer?
Ask the birds.

Fear or love, baby?
Don't say the answer
Actions speak louder than words.

Why should we try to be our best
When we can just get by and still gain?
Why do we nod our heads
Although we know
The boss is wrong as rain?

Why should we blaze a trail
When the well worn path seems safe and
So inviting?
How-as we travel, can we
See the dismay-
And keep from fighting?

Cages or wings?
Which do you prefer?
Ask the birds

Fear or love, baby?
Don't say the answer
Actions speak louder than words

What does it take
To wake up a generation?
How can you make someone
Take off and fly?

If we don't wake up
And shake up the nation
We'll eat the dust of the world
Wondering why

Why do we stay with lovers
Who we know, down deep
Just aren't right?

Why would we rather
Put ourselves through hell
Than sleep alone at night?

Why do we follow leaders who never lead?
Why does it take catastrophe to start a revolution?
If we're so free, tell me why?
Someone tell me why
So many people bleed?

Cages or wings?
Which do you prefer?
Ask the birds.

Fear or love, baby?
Don't say the answer.
Actions speak louder than words